Apa orang kata

Dalam kehidupan, kite memang tak dapat lari drp fikiran "apa orang kata?", "what will people think?", "is it acceptable?". for example sebelum kuar rumah kadang2 kita pilih baju mana yang nak pakai, sebab takut2 tak sesuai dengan majlis atau worried that someone will criticize your appearance.

sometimes it's annoying coz kita buat semua ni bukan sebab nak please anybody pun kan? but why people like to comment on what we do or what we say? most of the time we are not disturbing their life, are we? even perkara yang kecik macam keluar/balik rumah lewat malam or tumpangkan orang berlainan jantina dalam kereta pun orang dah bole buat gossip macam2. sometimes kalo a guy tegur a girl kat tempat orang ramai pun dah boleh jadi issue. lol

usually the more popular you are, the more you will be affected. ni theory je la, sebab saya perhatikan celebrity atau pemimpin2 lagi teruk kena. even tersilap cakap sepatah perkataan pun dah boleh jadi berita panas. orang2 yang komen pula boleh jadi family, kawan, musuh, boss, peminat, penyokong, orang yang tak kenal etc.

busybody kan mereka? why don't they just mind their own business? haa... ok let's analyze this problem. let's start by looking at why do they do that. generally golongan yang mengkomen ni terbahagi kepada dua :
1. yang supportive
2. yang destructive

camne nak tau? biasanya yang supportive ni akan memberi komen2 yang membina, and they care about you. they don't want you to repeat the same mistakes and be in trouble in the future. most importantly, they DON'T TALK BEHIND YOUR BACK. contohnya bila medical students masuk ward untuk belajar, tiba2 ada doctor tegur "lain kali kalo masuk ward perkenalalkan la diri dulu, jangan la main masuk je". satu lagi contoh, kat youtube saya perhati jugak kat ruangan comments kat bawah video tu, bila ada orang salah eja/typo, kadang2 ada orang lain akan tegur spelling/grammar errors. simple things like "it's supposed to be challengers, not challenges." (of course some of them don't understand about colloquialism though. haha). destructive type? it's pretty straightforward, isn't it? lol

yes, they (supportive type) care about you. there is no doubt that their intention is good. but most of us find it difficult becoz there are 2 problems :
- sometimes the truth hurts
- the way they do it hurts your feelings

haha biase la manusia, kadang2 kita tak mau dengar pun perkara2 buruk pasal kita. but it's unavoidable, sebab kalau takde sape yang tegur kesalahan kita, macam mana kita nak improve kan? kadang2 kita tau kesalahan kita, tapi sengaja tak mau ubah, atau gave up trying. for example obesity - associated with many diseases. untuk orang yang overweight, kebenaran ni memang pahit. so they have to accept this. tetapi orang yang supportive boleh tegur dia dengan cara 'berhikmah' or with 'wisdom', right?
Situasi 1 : A datang kat orang yang overweight. A kata, "awak ni gemuk, kena turunkan berat badan."
Situasi 2 : B datang kat orang yang overweight. B kata, "jom pegi gym/jogging petang ni"

so agak2 mana satu lagi bagus? walaupun the truth hurts, but there are many ways of saying it. so in conclusion :
orang yang menegur :
- kalo betul kita nak tegur kesalahan or nak orang ubah sesuatu, do not talk behind their back.
- cara tegur tu biarlah berhikmah   

orang yang ditegur :
- be positive-minded, learn to accept constructive criticism and improve
- ignore the gossips and gossipers

jangan pulak ade orang terasa pasal post ni. haha. actually this is more like a self-reflection for me, untuk difikirkan bersama. maaf jika ada tersalah silap dan kata. thanks for reading :)